The Protein Queen

1.Protein Queen

A Protein Queen is a dumb broad who has a boyfriend that has her convinced that eating his sperm, taking a facial, or blowing a load to crust into her hair is good for her because sperm is “full of protein!”

Psst, hey Ted, I’ve turned my new girlfriend into a Protein Queen, claims she’s not into perv stuff. My next move is to video tape us and tell her its just so I can jerk off to if she isn’t around. I think she’ll believe just about anything!

(Source: urbandictionary.com)

A few days ago I posted a link that gave details of how to work out your Basal Metabolic Rate. Turns out mine is 1522 calories - a lot lower than I thought it would be, especially given the government recommended daily allowance (RDA) is 2000 calories. Definitely helpful to know. You can factor in a multiplier to adjust for how much activity you do throughout the day to make your figure more accurate. 

a very good place to start.

Monday

Low fat cottage cheese with roast chicken leftovers

1.5 jerk chicken breasts

Fat free raspberry yoghurt with 1.5 tbsp oatbran

Soya chocolate milk

Exercise: 25min jog/2min run/5min walk (treadmill); 100m row; 50 length swim; speed shopping!

VERDICT! I did not eat enough this day - I was hardly at home to be able to.

Tuesday

2 scrambled eggs

Low fat cottage cheese

Ham omelette <— I was at a pub and it was only thing on the menu I could eat, forgive the slight egg overload

Tuna steak

1/2 FF raspberry yohurt with <1tbsp oatbran

Soya chocolate milk

Exercise: 27min jog/5min walk (treadmill).

VERDICT! I managed to go to the pub 3 times in one day and steer clear of carbs or fried food. I deserve a willpower certificate.

Wednesday

FF raspberry yoghurt with 1.5 tbsp oatbran

2 scrambled eggs and smoked salmon (yum)

Low fat cottage cheese

Soya chocolate milk

3 chicken thighs in Nandos marinade 

FF natural yoghurt with a little honey

Exercise: A little skipping to David Guetta in the living room; 1.5hours pilates.

VERDICT! I missed not running and I’m beginning to worry about the effects of the chocolate soya milk, apparently it encourages fat around the stomach?

Friday

FF peach yoghurt with 1.5tbsp oatbran

1 homemade turkey burger (obviously just the meat!)

2 scrambled eggs with chives

1 soya chocolate milk

1/2 slice of turkey breast

2 scoops of Ben and Jerry’s chocolate brownie fro-yo <— Oops! But there was hardly any actual brownie in it… :S

A few prawns and mussels

Exercise: 60 length swim.

VERDICT! Although I ate ok-ish today and swam quite intensely, I don’t feel slimmer or more toned. Its the lack of running, I know it. The worst thing is that I’m hardly going to get a chance to work out this weekend :(

I had this for breakfast with scrambled eggs sprinkled with chives - it was delicious and incredibly satisfying. The batter forms something between an omelette and a pancake, making it perfect to use in the place of bread. Think sandwiching a turkey burger between two small galettes or topping with smoked salmon.

1. In a small jug, mix 1.5tbsp oatbran, 1.5tbsp of FF quark/fromage frais and 1 egg.

2. Either sweeten with 1tbsp of sweetener (for sweet galettes) or a little salt (for savoury).

3. Lightly oil a non-stick frying pan and pour in the batter. Cook for 2-3 mins on each side.

Makes 1 large galette (20cm diameter) or 2 smaller ones. Serves 1.

Eat fresh and hot or wrap in foil and keep in the fridge for up to a week. Freezable.

Source: p.70, Dr. P. Dukan, The Dukan Diet, Hodder & Stoughton, London, UK, 2010

To liven up meat!

Use FF natural yoghurt and mix with 1tbsp Dijon mustard (or to taste) until the consistency of mayonnaise. Add a dash of vinegar, salt, pepper and herbs.

Source: Dr. P. Dukan, The Dukan Diet, Hodder and Staughton, London, UK, 2010.

My bro and myself’s favourite meal of the moment.

Heavily adapted the turkey burgers from Epicurean Body Builder’s turkey kebabs. This meal is quite Mediterranean in flavour and perfect for Summer! (Though we will probably be eating this all Winter too)

Turkey Burgers:

• 500g minced turkey thigh
• 1/2 red onion, finely diced
• 1/4 tsp cinnamon
• 1 tsp smoked paprika
• salt and pepper

In a large bowl, combine all the ingredients. Mix with your hands until everything is evenly distributed.

Roll into balls, about 7cm in diameter, then squish down into small burgers. I usually get 8 burgers.

Heat a large frying pan and wipe round a small drop of olive oil. Put the burgers in the pan on a medium heat and cook for about 4 mins on either side. Turn only once. 

Tzatziki Style Dip:

This is tzatziki ‘style’ in that it has all the freshness and minty flavour of proper tzatziki but less ingredients and hence, less fuss, less effort, more laziness.

Make this before you start cooking the burgers. 

• 150g 0% fat greek yoghurt
• juice of 1/2 a lemon
• 15 leaves of mint, finely chopped
• small handful of parsley, finely chopped
• 70g cucumber, finely diced
• salt and pepper

Stir all ingredients together until combined. Taste and check for seasoning. 

I served this with wholemeal pitta bread (all the better for stuffing) and a simple side salad of cos lettuce, tomato, red onion and cucumber. 

Serves me and 1 brother.

(Source: proteinqueen)

are returning. But on the plus side, its cardio :)

How will I navigate the cinema snack minefield of the foyer?? To fro-yo, or not to fro-yo? Ben and Jerry’s push the boundaries of ‘low-fat’.

<3 Chocolate brownie and phish food.

I’ll update you later on the strength of my willpower in my food diary.

Saturday

2 scrambled eggs with chives and 1/2 a fillet of smoked mackeral

1 peach yoghurt with 1.5 tbsp oatbran

3 fried chicken strips <— I was in a pub

Ham with a little salad (2 leaves of Cos lettuce, 1 slice tomato)

2 glasses of wine

2 shots of black sambuca <— pretty good considering I was out

1/5 chicken breast when I got in 

Exercise: Does dancing count??

VERDICT! Yesterday was just too tricky to not break my diet given that I ate dinner at someone else’s house and then went to a bar. But the only real thing I did wrong was the salad and I can take that hit :) 

In a jar put 1tbsp Dijon mustard, 5tbsp balsamic vinegar, 1tsp vegetable oil, salt and black pepper. Screw the lid on and shake. 

For extra flavour, you may like to add a whole garlic clove to marinate, or some fresh herbs.

Source: Dr. P. Dukan, The Dukan Diet, Hodder and Stoughton, London, UK, 2010